Let March Begin!

We are now on the road to happiness! Well, happier times at least.

Last week was pretty crap, in fact February has been a bit of a dire month all in all. Monday we attended Jay's Grandad's funeral. It was a nice service, hearing about his life was a particular high point. I liked hearing how his Son's friends would call on him to come out and play football instead of his Son, hah! He was in a wicker casket which is eco-friendly and the family had picked yellow and blue flowers to represent Pompey as he was always a fan. It's awful to say it and not a very nice occasion to get together but it was lovely to see some of Jay's Family we don't see all the time.

Tuesday I made the decision to go and see my Nan. She was in the Chapel of Rest at the Co-Operative Funeral Directors in Fratton. The night before my Mum asked me if I really wanted to go, and to have a think about it. It was a really difficult decision as my Dad had chosen not to go. He'd seen her on the morning that she left us and said she looked peaceful which was enough for him so fair enough. I had seen her Friday evening when she was probably the most coherent she's been in a while but she still looked awful and when I kissed her, her face was cold. A few people said to me is that the lasting image you want to remember your nan? I thought about it and the only out come was it was either her suffering in hospital and the nurses struggling to move her over the bed as my last memory or her laying peacefully. I thought if I saw her at the Chapel and it was awful, I would probably get over it. But if I didn't go, I would forever be thinking that I should have done. My Grandad came along with my Uncle and my Great Auntie. My Grandad was very good with the whole situation and to be honest I thought I would be too. I didn't know what to expect and I honestly thought i'd just go in, hold her hand, or kiss her head and say goodbye. I couldn't even get that close to the Coffin. She looked peaceful and settled but it was so quiet in the Chapel you could have heard a pin drop and that made me feel really uncomfortable. I stood rooted to the spot for about 3 or 4 minutes and just walked out again, I couldn't even touch her. It was the most bizarre of feelings. I didn't really feel like it was my Nan, it really did feel like her soul had left the body and she was somewhere else.

Her funeral was on Thursday and there was a great turn out, out of all this it has really made me realize we should make the effort to be a little closer to my Uncle & my Cousins. We listening to Goodbye Ruby Tuesday as we left the Crematorium, I think Nan would have really liked the whole service. The wake was at the same place we had Jay's Grandad's so it was a little De Ja Vu! Again it was lovely to see lots of family members.

A rubbish week was topped off with an utterly stunning wedding. My Cousin Christopher married Charlotte at the Elvetham hotel in Hampshire and it was incredible! I've never been to such an amazing wedding! When you have a 'Sorbet' in between courses you know it's posh....It was a brilliant day, I wish we could do it all over again! :o)