Newest Holy Molys tbh

Pig flu bandwagon product advertisers:

"Any company trying to sell products off the back of the Pig Flu non-event, like anyone who sells tissues or handwash. I hope you get it first you fucking parasites..."

Traffic Wardens:

"Take the wheel of my van you spineless cunt and YOU try and make a delivery on a busy high street without parking on double yellow lines. Yes I know there are 'loading bays' but they are currently occupied by cunty car drivers 'nipping in' to the bank/post office. Why aren't you fucking them over instead of making my already hard job harder?"

Thursday's Metro:

"Page 21, a story about a dumb fuck woman killing an elephant for a bet and the metro actually printing it. Cunts all round!"

Glade Advert:

"I want to do a poo, I want to do a poo at Pauls! Fuck off to Pauls then you spoiled little cunt I hope his dad turns out to be Gary Glitter, then in future you will do a shit wherever you're fucking told."

Kill your speed Advert:

"Bloke spends his day seeing the dead body of a kid he knocked over. Goes shopping - dead body. Brushes teeth - corpse. Can't sleep - mangled child. Slight flaw here, the kid is a fucking ginger. Surely it encourages speeding if the end result is a flat duracel on the pavement? No harm, no foul here. They are a fair game, day-glo, water for blood, beacon for bonnets, target. People care more about cats than gingers. They should have used a dead cat instead. Daft cunts."

Stella 4%:

"A lighter brew than the Original Ole Wife Beater. Still gave me a bastard hangover."

Tim Lovejoy:

"I honestly don't know where to start, and daren't for the possiblity of never reaching the end."

Madonna:

"Who the fuck do you think you are choosing one lucky child to have a silver spoon life while the rest of the poor bastards starve to death? Isn't it better to build the town a school or something and give them all a fucking meal or two rather than pick one at random."

Confused.com Advert:

"How can a website be very friendly? That 'random' cunt in the purple t-shirt can fuck off as well."

Work:

"Just because you are very lucky to even have a job, does not make it less shit."

WH Smith:

"Can I interest you in some Galaxy chocolate for 99p? No, or I'd have picked some up myself. Isn't that how a shop is supposed to work? Still, nice response to the national obesity crisis."